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But if they hadn’t said so, you wouldn’t have known.Over the last three years, transgender awareness has exploded.Our cultural obsession with feminine beauty contributes to the imbalance.“Women’s appearances get more attention, women’s actions are commented on and critiqued more than men, so in that world it just makes sense that people will focus more on trans women than trans men,” says Julia Serano, a transgender activist and author of (Because most surveys ask people to identify as male or female but not cisgender or transgender, the size of the transgender population in America is unclear, though one study suggests there are about 700,000 trans people in the U.Three guys are sitting at a Harlem bartop eating fries, drinking whiskey and talking about love.One of them, Bryce Richardson, is about to propose to his girlfriend.“If I’m going off-the cuff, no-one really questions it,” Ward says.“It’s taken as, ‘He’s saying it, so it must be true.’ Whereas while I was practicing as female, it was ‘Show me your authority, you don’t know any better yet.’” Mitch Davis is now a director of organizational development at Planned Parenthood Federation of America in New York City, but he’s worked in HR for many different companies since coming out eight years ago.

The other men light up when they hear the news and start talking about rings, how much they cost, will it be princess cut or pear shaped? “That was one of my dreams, to get married, to be somebody’s husband, to be somebody’s father,” says one of the friends, Redd Barrett.

In one previous job, he heard his boss call female colleagues “old cows” and refer to a middle-aged job applicant as “Dame Edna” after she’d left an interview.

“Evidently men say things like that to each other all the time,” he says.

S.; it’s nearly impossible to know how many of them are trans men.) Yet experiences of trans men can provide a unique window into how gender functions in American society.

In the last few months, I’ve interviewed nearly two dozen trans men and activists about work, relationships and family.

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